High-Handed at the Shopping Mall

Dear Tracy,

I’m sorry that you high-handed me at the shopping mall while you were walking with all of your friends last Saturday. I want you to know that I’m a much more mature person than you are and that I have added you to my nightly prayers.

Another weird palindrome:

I woke up at 3:11am from a dream where I was questioned about the source of my fortitude. My answer:

Dog DNA and God.

I need to stop eating before bed.

Another day, another sestina

Not sure why but sometimes these (very technical poems) can be very easy to write.

Sorry if this has a ton of mistakes… the guy that I used to run these by is still very deceased and irreplaceable.

It needn’t end in peers

My daughter said that one of her friends at school was upset – telling her that he’d just been kicked out of his band.

I told her to tell him to form a NEW band called “FU to my old band” and then write a song called “I hope you all die in a bus accident!”

Fortunately she didn’t listen beyond telling him to form a new band!

One from the vault

This is a really short story that was embedded in a chat message to a friend.

And YES – I know there are errors… it was written more or less in one continuous string of words…

And a Child(ish) Shall Lead The Way

Sorry to break the silence (been busy with stuff that isn’t funny… nothing bad – more like ‘work’ (I hate that word!).)

I just read something that hit the nail on the head of how I’ve felt for a while. (Keep in mind, what I JUST read was originally written 5 months ago… I’m a slow readr.). Responding to the latent “Cancel Culture” and it’s attacks on everyone from Rocky and Bullwinkle to Dave Chappelle, “Childish Gambino” aka Donald Glover made (and then deleted) some posts on Twitter. The parts that struck me were:

“Saw people on here havin a discussion about how tired they were of reviewing boring stuff (tv & film),”

“We’re getting boring stuff and not even experimental mistakes(?) because people are afraid of getting cancelled,”

YES!

I wrote a piece that I never got published about the role of satire in the healthy development of a mind, a person AND a community. People need to feel safe enough to explore all of their thoughts – even the really stupid ones.

NO!

I’m not advocating that everyone acts on their first inclination towards violence or hatred.

BUT!

I don’t actually believe that a sane/competent person can have opinions for or against a subject without at least taking their thoughts right up to fulcrum where the fundamental issues reside and spin.

AND!

There are people who are eagerly wringing their hands with unimaginable delight at the idea that American society is in decay. The fact that everyone has the right to express an opinion has been weaponized and finally used to suppress those opinions. Those people are laughing because the saw it coming and think that they were able to deftly avoid the same problems by way of unifying thoughts and deeds.

AGAIN!

When we are eliminating hatred for people based on their color or religion or how they like to dance in public – that IS a good thing. But when we mandate that you can’t make fun of people for dancing in public – that is a terrible thing.

I learned my racial tolerance in a two-fold way: 1) I was raised in an extremely diverse city where from one year to the next there could be influxes of people from different parts of the world. On the playground we were not ‘black’ or ‘white’ – we were just children and as long as you didn’t condone dancing in public you could play kick-ball with us.

2) I had a home life that was guided by my parents who were keenly aware of the snide remarks that people made at them when they first arrived in America in 1955 (that’s not actually ‘that’ long ago if you think about it in the context of music… anyway.) My mother and father didn’t like being made fun of and I didn’t like that they felt ‘less than’ anyone else. When my first inclination was to return the favor and persecute OTHER people who were different, they stopped me. But they also SHOWED ME that making someone else feel bad isn’t going to make them or anyone else feel better in a lasting way. The only way forward was and still is to take people as they are.

There HAVE been situations where I simply didn’t like a person. But I didn’t decide to widen my circle out to target everyone who came from that same country or county. My angst began and ended on an individual level.

I’ve also poked fun at people who are very, very close to me because of their dancing and their sexual proclivities. But that was always only people that I knew extremely well and NEVER as a means of achieving some kind of weird dominance over a situation.

I’m circling round and round here…

What I want to say is that if you don’t like Dave Chappelle then I think you need to tell him that. I’m pretty sure he’s mature enough to understand that it is part of the social contract. But don’t cancel him. I happen to love his work. It makes me laugh most of the time. It makes me cringe some of the time. And occasionally (because I study the things that comics say) it makes me sad to listen to. His most recent monologue on “Saturday Night Live” was painful to listen to in parts because it was true. People with power exploit and exploit and exploit and deplete and then they dispose of. Dave Chappelle is simply fighting back by getting paid – let him get paid! Let him fight back! His words are not those of a role model… but his blue-print for ‘flipping the bird’ to the entire system IS something that we can adopt and use for our own means.

If we don’t have that ability to make fools of ourselves by saying stupid things or by busting out our best “Saturday Night Fever” moves at a wedding we can’t ever learn. The people with the power will simply point the cancel cannon at us and we’ll be gone. POOF! Back to my desk, jockey numbers on a spreadsheet, pretending I really give a crap about hedge funds.

(NO – I haven’t seen his latest special yet. I won’t watch it because I find it offensive.

Kidding!

Look at where I live; stuff like that is a slow grind to get hold of. And that slow grind is brought to you by the people with the power of the cancel cannon.)

File under “editorial crisis”

Part of the problem with decentralized work arrangements is that when you don’t all drink from the same water-bubbler you can’t share insights about what you’re working on.

Clearly if the two authors of these stories had had 5 min to chat about their current list of topics neither one of them would have been so shocked.

It is a metaphor for marriage

The genesis of these toothbrush diplomacy posts comes from my own medicine cabinet. Just the other day my blue toothbrush was gone and replaced by a very nice moss-green unit.

The problem is my wife replaced hers with a really cool looking pink brush! And every day I almost grab it to brush MY teeth… then I come to my green senses.

There once was a man in Hong Kong

There once was a man in Hong Kong

Who lived his whole life like a song

When his chorus was finished

His voicing diminished

….Danicoke usually wrote the last lines

For the past few weeks “Danicoke” has been leaving short poems in the guestbooks of the local “Queequeg’s Coffee” branches …

It isn’t getting better

I still feel the same

It hasn’t made things easier

Without someone to blame.

There’s only one thing crazier than a bull…

… A clown.

If you’re hear from my ad on Facebook, you will know this picture.

Not much to this one: bulls ride around in large trailers or train cars. Clown cars are more crammed for space.

I was born in the year of the Ox so I can identify with the Ox on certain levels. I am a pure and utter idiot, so I can see things from the clown’s perspective too. I don’t know who wins.